As our due date drew near,  we felt like we were cramming for an exam that we had no way of preparing for because in the end we did not know what would be on this ‘test’. We felt unprepared and therefore nervous. We did not want our family’s birth experience to be clouded with feelings of nervousness or fear. We met with Michelle and…we knew right away. She would bring a sense of calmness and wisdom from experience that empowered us to usher our child into the world in the way that we wanted. We never felt like we had to check our queerness at the door. It cleared up some of our mental space to be able to be open for being totally present with this miracle instead of distracted. We got to really BE THERE with it. We never were made to feel like we were merely queer tourists visiting the land of heteronormativity simply because we were embarking on birth (taking part in birth) which has been traditionally reserved for heterosexuals. Our child’s birth story, just like her conception, and just like her parents is as radical, unique and queer as they come. There was pain, exhaustion, sleep deprivation, confusion, fear, love, fight, incredible endurance, imagination, creativity, and endless moments of anticipation of the unknown. Michelle was able to dig into those moments and mine out their beauty. Even months later, there are moments that are very solid in my memory that I can still viscerally feel the beauty that she brought to light.  I am certain that I would have missed it otherwise. Every part of our souls and our child’s soul was a part of this birth. All our parts, including our diversity, were present.”

-first time non-gestational parent